Monday, June 17, 2013

Solution for the Summer Doldrums - Birthday Style!

Summer without siblings can be tricky. Sure you have Mom to yourself, but she's not always the best playmate when she's glued to the computer working on Student Ministry, Local Ministry Groups, plans for visiting Bolivia next month, and end of the fiscal year details for CVM. The neighbor girl's not always home, the TV's usually off-limits, and the dog can only entertain you so long. What's a tween to do for the virtually endless hours of summer??

Don't worry kiddos who find yourself in a similar rut, Angie has the ultimate solution for you: MAKE EVERY DAY YOUR BIRTHDAY! Seriously, Mom and Dad will be totally on board with this revolutionary idea, promise. When there's a surprise around every corner, presents coming out of your ears, and did I mention sugary treats ad nauseam--literally, you won't put on a pouty face even once, you might even keep the eye-rolling to a minimum. And that makes for a super special day for EVERYONE.

Angie turned 11 on Saturday, and in honor of the big event she slept in till an unprecedented 11am this morning catching up from the weekend's festivities.

We started her birthday fun by running as fast as we could for 3.1 miles (with random periods of walking due to cramps in her stomach, neck, brain, etc.) At this point many of you might be thinking, "running 3 miles does not sound like my kind of fun," and in hindsight Angie would have to agree with you. But it was her idea, and now I'm worried, the shiny little medal's gonna cloud her memory of the half hour of incessant whining plus the hours of whine-filled training runs, the next time such an opportunity presents itself.
After the seven members of Team Spears ran Angie's first, and possibly last 5K, we refueled on some Chick-fil-a, DQ ice cream cake, and presents!


Then, we ushered everyone outside, to keep Angie from destroying the house with her new hula hoop, and to subtly direct her to the backyard where her brand new swings awaited her!

And finally, the fun really began when two of Angie's besties joined us for squealing, popcorn, giggling, movies, pizza, screaming, cupcakes, running, swinging, whispering, playing, jumping on beds, tickling, twirling, more squealing, and bowling! All the ingredients that make for a nearly sleepless sleepover, and a pretty short-fused Father's Day to follow. But I hope we also made my daddy and Angie's daddy feel special and loved even though their day couldn't be quite as full as Angie's (after Five Guys and leftover cupcakes their bellies might have been as full though.)

And, in other really good news, one of the pajama party participants tagged along for church, so we were able to convince Angie to stay in Children's Chapel! Hopefully, the first step toward a little more independence for her, and freedom to serve in the tech booth for us. Plus, praise - that her little friend was full of questions and eagerness to learn more about God. All around a successful weekend. Thanks to so many of you who's birthday wishes, cards, gifts, and calls made Angie one happy 11 year-old!

Thursday, June 6, 2013

SHE DID IT!

Don't get me wrong, your little ones running around in graduation caps are adorable! Really, the cuteness of each and every one of them on Facebook makes me smile. But in general, I tend to side with Bob from The Incredibles when it comes to pre-school, kindergarten, even elementary school graduations:

Helen: I can't believe you don't want to go to your own son's graduation.
Bob: It's not a graduation. He is moving from the 4th grade to the 5th grade.
Helen: It's a ceremony!
Bob: It's psychotic! They keep creating new ways to celebrate mediocrity, but if someone is genuinely exceptional...

Since we didn't have any superhero world-saving to otherwise occupy us, my parents, Jon, and I attended Angie's "ceremony" for moving from 5th grade to 6th grade, yesterday. 

As the children crossed the stage, some all dolled up seemingly ready for prom, some wearing the polo and khakis of their class uniform, the school counselor read what awards lay waiting for them in their big white envelope. Principal's Gold Award, Principal's Silver Award, Citizenship Award, Orchestra something or other, Perfect Attendance, Most Improved Math, Academic Achievement Science, Academic Achievement Writing, Academic Achievement Reading, Academic Achievement All Subjects, etc. etc. etc. Since we had nothing but time while we waited for the processional to reach the "S" of Spears, I leaned over to Jon and facetiously asked "What do you think Angie will get?" He gently replied, "A Certificate of Diploma!" with a tone of voice that shamed me for thinking anything could be greater.
You see, it's one thing for a child to glide seamlessly from one grade to the next, advancing from pre-K, to K, to 1st,... 5th, and then make the jump into the great unknown of middle school. And I don't doubt each step of that progression might have been fraught with obstacles for many children. I mean it's no less than a miracle to get them out of bed some days, then add learning to read, to write, HOMEWORK, bullies, multiplication, division, long division, crushes on boys, the state capitals.........

 But what Angie has done is another thing all together, and nothing short of incredible!  Before Angie made it into the orphanage where I found her, she lived with a family who treated her very poorly, so poorly in fact that they only put her in school for about a week, then pulled her out when the school required her to have supplies. So, there was no pre-K in Angie's background, nor kindergarten. She finally started elementary school once she'd escaped to Talita Cumi, but by this point she was way behind. 

First grade for her was half days in a Bolivian Spanish public school for kids from orphanages. Then I turned her world upside down. For less money than it would have cost me to get her daycare for the second half of the day, I switched her to a Bolivian bi-lingual private school for 2nd grade. After a year of learning some English from Bolivian accented teachers, we realized we might be coming back to the States so we switched her to an international school, where she had U.S. teachers, U.S. curriculum, and the entire day was in English. The school year also flipped from the Southern hemisphere to using the Northern school calendar, so we could either drop her back a semester or bump her up one. Since she was so far behind already we convinced her 3rd grade teacher to let her skip half of a year, and we crammed a semester of 3rd grade in at home over Christmas break.

After one semester of 3rd grade, she began 4th at the same school. One semester later, we moved back to the U.S. where the policy is to put a child in the grade where their age belongs. So she then skipped the second half of 4th grade and the first half of 5th to join her peers in a new culture and still perplexing language. So, to sum up: Angie skipped half of 3rd, 4th, and 5th grades while switching languages, cultures and families. Talk about a recipe for stress!

Although I would not in a million years recommend this accelerated method to anyone who's IQ is less than say 200, we made it. She made it! With the help of her grandparents, teachers like Lisa Speyers, Martha Thomas, Rachel Rogers, and God Himself, Angie has graduated fifth grade against all odds. 
I'm fully aware that we have a ways to go before she's reading on a sixth grade level, or understands U.S. history, but we've come a long way Baby, and I'm so proud of her!  

Monday, June 3, 2013

I'm Bored!!

If you're a mom chances are you read Jen Hatmaker's latest blog post Worst End of School Year Mom Ever where she encouraged us all in solidarity with statements like: 

"Hang in there, Mama. Just a few more days until summer, when approximately 19 minutes into our glorious respite from homework, liberated from the crush of it all, ready to party like it’s 1999, our precious children, having whooped and celebrated and “graduated” and squealed all the way home will announce: "I'm bored.""

Around here I've been luxuriating in the relatively homework-less last couple weeks of school, and I'm looking forward to a break from packing lunches, washing uniforms, and dragging my child out of bed every morning. However, I regard the end of the school year more with healthy trepidation than unadulterated glee.

Stay at Home Moms, you've probably got this all figured out; your season passes to the pool, museums, and the zoo were purchased long ago. Working Moms, I bet you have your sitters all lined up, a plan for dropping the kids off at daycare, or a system of juggling them between family members. But here's what I wanna know, what do you Working From Home Moms do when your little ones aren't being cared for by the public school system 8 hours/day?? Unless Angie is glued to the TV or mesmerized by computer games she is calling "Mommy" on average 17 times/minute. Now fortunately for me, and my employer, CVM, summer's my slower season, with little travel, and a lighter workload, but still I'm not taking a Summer Sabatical here. So, instead of cartwheeling over our imminent freedom from test anxiety and writing assignments, I'm clinging to my one last day of freedom to work in peace before Fifth Grade Graduation on Wednesday brings Angie crashing home for three months!

Some of you may remember that we started a behavior chart a couple years ago, and I'm still printing a new one every week. Angie loves predictability, routine, and rewards so the chart, although it has yet to pull her out of a tantrum once she's started slipping down that slope, has motivated her to get in the shower on more than one occasion. And, it's given us a consistent way to calculate her allowance each week.
Now, inspired by my friend, mom of three, Jenny Cabantac, I've put together a plan for Angie's days at home with me over her summer break. Likely without a schedule she'd be vegging in front of the TV by 10am when I've exhausted the tiny ration of patience and creativity I've been blessed with, trying to get her to do something useful with her life. My hope is that the list might keep her busy with productive activities, give her some control over her schedule, some goals, and ultimately build into her some confidence for sixth grade. Because while I'm panicking about the end of fifth grade, Angie's dreading the beginning of sixth.

Don't worry, we're still open to invitations to your pool, we still plan to visit Bolivia, and we're all set for family camp in California. Angie will have the flexibility to play with friends outside and make good choices about time management and priorities. And no, I didn't embark on this motherhood adventure yesterday, I know it's not gonna be flawless, but if we don't even try, the kid's gonna forget what a fraction is and probably how to spell her own name, if there's not a character named "Angie" on one of her cartoons.
So, moms, dads, grandparents, nannies, organized people of all walks of life, we welcome your input. How do you keep your munchkins' brains from going to mush and simultaneously get some work done during the summer months of our children's vacillating fun and boredom??