Monday, August 13, 2012

Mosquitoes, Sand and Relearning Joy

It was kind of a rough week. As many of you who read my last post could have imagined, it was hard leaving my husband after less than two weeks of being able to call him mine.  It was particularly hard for Angie to move into Jon's house on Monday after the honeymoon and then repack her suitcase to relocate again the same Friday. As she was able to verbalize so well this time in her mess of not-so-pretty emotions, she really hates change. Even though returning to Bolivia, Spanish, and her friends was a move she was eagerly awaiting, change is hard for everyone to some degree, and in a young life that's had more than its fair share of transition, stability is all the more coveted. Last night, we were finally able to Skype with Jon and when we prayed together, she asked God to let Jon come down here so we could be a "normal" family. 

And then there was the adjustment for me. Let's be honest, I'd become spoiled rotten in the States for two months with its fancy dishwashers and dryers, reliable water, relative cleanliness, temperature control, consistently speedy internet, Papa John's, I could go on... And of course it's been a challenge for me to spend money re-buying all the things I just sold in May, and all the items we just received as wedding gifts in June and July. Shopping for towels, kitchen utensils, bath mats, pillows, sheets, etc. has felt more than redundant.  

Oh my goodness, I sound whiny. Why am I telling you all this? To say that yesterday I finally felt "happy" to be here. And then I was embarrassed. I was sitting in church, worshipping with my Bolivian family of believers again and I was in a really good mood, it was really nice to be back with them.

For the first few days here, when things were less than ideal, I thought, "this is way harder than the first time I moved down three years ago, because the first time I chose to come here." Everything was an adventure. Any adversity was part of the fun, since I had come down on purpose with a calling, the mosquitoes, the insane traffic, the ubiquitous sand, and the other challenges were all the more thrilling. But this time, being outside of my plan, the inconveniences were all just kind of a drag.  When we were having a hard time setting up house and things were looking a bit bleak, I got a little down.

So, when my positive outlook was restored I was ashamed of myself, because I'm pretty sure it was circumstantial. Due to the kindness of so many friends, over the past few days we've been blessed with a borrowed washing machine, refrigerator, oven, fans, bedspreads, furniture, and much more. And I'm afraid my upturn in attitude may have been directly proportional to our improvement in standard of living.

This week when I was reminded of Paul and his call to be content in all circumstances, I thought of his surroundings. Paul wrote those words from a prison cell. A situation he surely had not chosen, nor penciled into his day planner. A trial he'd not signed up for, yet one he fully embraced, and refused to let affect his joy. 

I guess I tell you all this in hopes that next time I'm faced with hardships I won't make excuses, but remember to rejoice always, and not just when it's convenient. 


"I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through Him who gives me strength."
-Philippians 4:11-13
We're renting the top floor of this house.  The cow is a bonus!

3 comments:

Lisa said...

We learn the best lessons through the worst times! I guess we should embrace them. Glad you're getting so much support and you're feeling better about things!

Anonymous said...

Lauren...I have never met you but my sister has....lol. I really enjoyed reading your post and hope you continue to write. May you always be blessed with safe travels and a happy new marriage/family. I just know God will prevail for you and your new family. You have the right attiude and a beautiful spirit.

Beth said...

Thanks Lauren. Been having a rough time at work the last couple days and your post helped me put things in perspective and lifted my spirits! Glad your getting settled. Miss you and Angie!