Advent Storying

I owe you all an apology. I posted this picture in November:

I’m usually better about steering away from posts that might lead anyone to false assumptions about our perfect life and unattainable #famgoals. The twinkling lights and Instagram filters must have gotten to me. I’m sorry.

I knew I’d crossed my own boundary of over-idealistic posting, when this comment started garnering more attention than any of my other comments in recent memory:

“I’m sure it won’t be as lovely as the idea. No one goes to bed at the same time here. Angie will never be around, Paul will try to eat the books, Isaiah will then cry because his brother ate the book, etc. But if we can tell our kids the story of Jesus’ birth like 24+ times this month— that’s a win!”

And then when a friend made this comment, I knew I owed you all a reality check after the fact.

“Thank you for the great idea and for posting your “keeping it real” comment. I needed that dose of reality to balance my impressions/delusions of perfection.”

I, all too often, get drawn into the story people craft, possibly sometimes intentionally, but usually inadvertently, of their picture-perfect life and family. I never want to make anyone feel like they can’t keep up with the Charleseseses, because believe me you can, we can’t even agree on how many “eses” to put after our surname!

So, here’s what really happened in our 24 days of advent storying. 

First, my family thought I was nuts for taking random pictures while we were reading. Well, Angie likely did, by now, Jon is probably more surprised if I’m not documenting a moment with photos.

You’ll be happy to know (since many were library books), that Paul did not eat any of them. But Isaiah found other things to cry about.

We did read 24 books about Christmas, the last one this evening, but of the 5 of us, I’m the only one who read all 24. As often as not, someone was missing. Paul had gone to bed before story time, Angie went out with friends, and Jon and Isaiah missed one reading because Isaiah couldn’t keep it together. I’m pretty sure his epic meltdown was over us reading the “wrong” book. He didn’t like the number we chose and there would be no convincing him that was the correct date. 

Even on the best of nights, children were wandering around, as their attentions wandered likewise. Here is what it often looked like while we tried to share the story of the Christ-child.

This is Isaiah reading a book while the rest of the family is reading a different book.

Notice this time Isaiah in the other room playing during story time. SMH

But then there were moments like these as well:

Angie spent 3 weeks reading bedtime stories with us! Probably my favorite part of the whole experience was passing each book around to take turns reading and having her join in every third page. How many nights would it take to convince her to actually like reading? We’ll keep going if there’s hope!

And yesterday, Isaiah randomly turned over a candy cane and said, “It’s a J, for Baby Jesus.” The kid knows the Christmas story now. He might have learned it otherwise, but reading it most nights for a month sure was a fun way to teach him about Jesus’ birth.

What expectations are you still holding onto for a picture-perfect Christmas? 

I know I expect a low-stress punctual departure for road trips every time. Am I insane? This never bodes well for a happy ride. 

Anyone else have false expectations that their kids might be able to share their stuff a little? Isaiah can’t even handle Paul playing with Paul’s new toys.  

Here’s one; I somehow expect other people to read my mind, know exactly my taste, and buy me perfect gifts. That awkward moment when you know someone really tried and it’s just not your style, at all. Ugh.

A few other warnings for any Holiday gatherings you may have left to participate in:

- Do not expect everyone to get along and agree every moment of your event. 

- Do not bring up politics and expect a light cheerful discussion.

- We shouldn't expect to be in close quarters for extended periods during cold and flu season, and come out unscathed.

- You're setting yourself up for a let down if you think all the food you painstakingly prepare will come out Top Chef quality or even be ready all at the same time.

- And why do we expect our kids to act like adults? They have little to no impulse control, minimal moral compass, and much stronger instincts toward justice than grace. Plus, be ready for them to wake up far earlier than we’d like Christmas morning!

The only safe bet I know of this Christmas is that Christ is the hope of the world and the more we think and act like Him the less we’ll think of ourselves. If we put our hope in anything less we're likely to be disappointed, but Jesus will exceed all of our expectations.